The soft sound of snow crunching 雪嘎吱嘎吱的声音柔和

underfoot gives me comfort. 脚下给我安慰。

Her building is at the end of the block. 她的建筑物是在块的末尾。

She lives on the north side. 她住在北边。

Bottom floor. Middle apartment. 底层。中古公寓。

I see her: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 steps. 我看她： 1 ， 2 ， 3 ， 4 ， 5个步骤。

Wrong key. Lock clicks. She drops her 错了钥匙。锁点击。她滴了她

coat and scarf in the entry and 大衣和围巾，在进入和

kicks off those...vixen shoes. 揭开序幕的......狐狸精鞋。

She shuffles to the kitchen and pours 她慢腾腾地走到厨房，盆满钵满

a glass of scotch. (I am inside) 一杯威士忌。 （我里面）

She lights a cigarette and blows 她点了一支烟，并打击

the smoke over the match. (She doesn't notice) 烟雾在比赛。 （她不另行通知）

   

The gray smog rises from her 灰色的烟雾从她的上升

lips like a cremation furnace. 嘴唇像火葬炉。

The simple elegance of this quiet 这个宁静的古朴典雅

moment is almost irresistible. 此刻几乎是不可抗拒的。

(But, I wait) （不过，我等）

   

She slugs back the scotch, 她蛞蝓回苏格兰，

finishes her smoke and ashes it 完成她的烟雾和灰烬它

in the sink. She unties her hair 在水槽中。她解开她的头发

and enters the hallway, past the 并进入走廊，过去

childless bedroom with the empty 无子女的卧室，空

crib, past the altar coated in wax 婴儿床，过去涂在蜡坛

like a wedding cake, and the tiny 例如，婚礼蛋糕，微小

packages of meat, dead flowers, 肉类包装，凋谢的花，

and baby's breath. 和婴儿的呼吸。

   

She enters the bathroom, where 她进入浴室，在那里

she undresses. She sits on the 她脱下衣服。她坐在

edge of the bath. Her naked body 镀液的边缘。她赤裸的身体

folded in half, heavy tits hanging 对半折叠，重吊山雀

like mushy stalactites over her 像糊状钟乳石在她的

lap. (Oh, precious) She closes her 一圈。 （哦，珍贵的），她关闭了她

eyes and holds her head as if it 眼睛，抱着她的头，就好像它

might float away. 可能会漂走。

   

For a moment, my thoughts drift 有那么一刻，我的思绪飘

again, this time to the hammer 又，此时的锤

I am holding. The handle is 我拿的。句柄

smooth as bone, the forged steel 光滑如骨，锻钢

head is heavy, and I feel powerful. 头重，我觉得强大。

She reaches for the faucet 她的手伸向水龙头

and I snap back to the moment. 我弹回的瞬间。

Bubbles brim the edge of the 气泡洋溢的边缘

tub. Her fingers check the water 浴缸。她的手指检查水

temperature and I am ready. 温度，我准备好了。

   

I move behind her. She doesn't 我谨在她身后。她不

hear. I swing the hammer. She 听到。 í摆动锤。她

doesn't see. I crack her skull. 不看。我打击她的头骨。

She's in the tub. Face down. I am 她是在浴缸中。面朝下。我

drowning her, mashing her head 她溺水，糖化她的头

to the bottom, knifing the claw of 的底部，重创的爪

the hammer into her spine and 锤到她的脊椎和

ribs over and over and over and 排骨过一遍又一遍，并

over and over and over and over 一遍又一遍又一遍又一遍

and over and.... 而过去， ....

   

Her body stops pretending to 她的身体停止假装

care and surrenders as it is supposed 关心和投降，因为它被认为

to. just to be sure, I press 要。只是可以肯定，我按

hard, keeping her head beneath 硬，让她的头下

the bloody water a few moments 血水片刻

more. Her neck snaps, her nose 更多。她的脖子卡住，她的鼻子

breaks, and her face collapses 休息时间，她的脸上崩溃

against the bottom of the tub. I 针对在桶的底部。 í

see my reflection in the mirror 看到我的倒影在镜子

and soapy foam has formed a half 和肥皂的泡沫已经形成了半

smile over the black nylon mask I 微笑在黑色的尼龙口罩í

am wearing 我穿

   

I lean to her. The water glistens 我倚她。水辉耀

like glass. I hover over the 像玻璃。 í在徘徊

surface, soft breath causing tiny 表面上看，柔美气息引起微小的

quakes, and whisper, "I have done 地震，并低声说：“我已经做了

to you what nature has done to me." 你是什么性质做了给我。 “

   

She doesn't reply. 她没有回答。

   

I stand and turn off the light. 我站在关灯。

The room is dark and empty. 房间是黑暗和空洞。

Just like I am now. 就像现在的我。