[Spoken:] [口语： ]

   

[Danny Sexbang:] [丹尼Sexbang ： ]

Hello, and welcome to "Talking Video Games." 您好，欢迎来到“会说话的电子游戏。 ”

Today's subject is "Games with Simple Plots." 今天的主题是“用简单的绘图游戏。 ”

I'd like to welcome our guests. 我想欢迎我们的客人。

Would each of you please say who you are, and give a brief summary of the plot of your game? 请问你们每个人请说你是谁，给你的游戏的剧情简要？

   

[Pac-Man (Egoraptor):] [吃豆人（ Egoraptor ） ： ]

YES HELLO MY NAME IS PAC-MAN AND I EAT DOTS AND FRUIT 是你好，我的名字是PAC -MAN和我吃了点和水果

   

[DK (Danny):] [ DK （丹尼） ： ]

My name is Donkey Kong, I throw barrels at a guy. 我的名字是金刚，我扔在桶的家伙。

   

[Cloud (Ego):] [云（自我） ： ]

Hi, I'm Cloud Strife from Final Fantasy VII. My game's plot is pretty simple. It goes like this... 嗨，我是云纷争最终幻想VII 。我的游戏的剧情非常简单。它是这样的...

   

[music] [音乐]

   

[Cloud:] [云： ]

I was a mercenary working for the AVALANCHE gang 我是一个佣兵工作雪崩团伙

Awesome eco-terrorists who you'd probably wanna bang 真棒生态恐怖分子，你想谁可能想爆炸

I got trapped in a reactor shortly after my last raid 我被陷在一个反应器我上次空袭后不久，

And got shot into a slum, where I could have gotten "squaids." 并获得拍摄成一个贫民窟，在那里我可以得到“ squaids 。 ”

That's squirrel AIDS, for anyone who's wondering at home 这是松鼠艾滋病的人谁是想在家里

Anyway, I met a girl inside the Midgar zone 无论如何，我认识了一个女孩米德加区内

Her name was Aerith and I soon became her bodyguard 她的名字是Aerith ，我很快就成了她的保镖

She knew how to work a staff, and she made my body hard 她知道如何工作的工作人员，她让我的身体硬

   

[Danny:] [丹尼： ]

Okay Cloud, this is getting complex 好吧云，这是越来越复杂

So I'm gonna move on to one of our other guests -- 所以我到我们的其他嘉宾之一会招 -

   

[Cloud:] [云： ]

I knew that Aerith was a Cetra 我知道Aerith是外贸协会

   

[Danny:] [丹尼： ]

...excuse me, I was singing-- ......原谅我，我是singing--

   

[Cloud:] [云： ]

She could lead us to a Promised Land where energy was springing 她能带领我们到应许之地，其中能量涌现

I went to rescue her, but I was captured and detained (Um --) 我去营救她，但我被抓获并拘留（庵 - ）

There I met Red XIII, a talking lion with a mane (Cloud --) 在那里，我遇到了红十三，一只会说话的狮子有鬃毛（云 - ）

The president of Shinra was shot by Sephiroth 神罗的总统被枪杀的Sephiroth

A super-evil JENOVA-style monster clone jerkoff (Hey!--) 阿超恶杰诺瓦风格的怪物克隆jerkoff （嘿 - ！ ）

We learned about JENOVA, got our things and then departed 我们了解了杰诺瓦，得到了我们的东西，然后离去

   

[Danny:] [丹尼： ]

Wait, I'm totally confused-- 等一下，我完全confused--

   

[Cloud:] [云： ]

I haven't even gotten started 我还没有得到启动

We met Cait Sith, as well as Vincent, Cid, and Yuffie 我们遇到了创新科技顾问西斯，还有文森特，CID，和尤菲

We had gotten very tired, and my balls were kinda poofy 我们已经得到了非常累，我的球是有点poofy

So Aerith let us rest, her tired ass continued on 所以Aerith让我们休息，她疲倦的屁股继续

Until Sephiroth killed her, and then she turned into a swan (What?!--) 直到Sephiroth的杀了她，然后她变成一只天鹅（这是什么？ - ！ ）

WAIT! That didn't happen. Sorry, let me get rebooted 等待！这并没有发生。对不起，让我重新启动

This is sort of where the plot gets a little convoluted 这有点其中的情节变得有点令人费解

An earthquake happened, then it started snowing like December 地震发生了，那么它开始下雪像十二月

Then some other shit went down that I don't seem to remember 那么其他一些狗屎去了，我好像不记得

   

[Danny:] [丹尼： ]

You're using up the whole show, Cloud, please take a rest 你使用了整场演出，云，请好好休息吧

So let's hear from one of our many other fine guests 因此，让我们从我们的诸多优良一位客人听到

Q*bert, what's your game about? Q * BERT ，什么是你的游戏呢？

   

[Q*bert (Ego):] [ Q * BERT （自我） ： ]

I jump on blocks! 我跳的块！

   

[Danny:] [丹尼： ]

And you, Asteroids ship? 而你，小行星出货？

   

[Asteroids ship (Ego):] [小行星船（自我） ： ]

I blow up rocks. 我吹了岩石。

   

[Cloud:] [云： ]

Back to my story, Sephiroth was casting spells 回到我的故事， Sephiroth的是施法

To make a giant Meteor, and blow Gaia to hell 为了使一个巨大的流星，吹盖亚地狱

   

[Glass Joe (Danny):] [玻璃乔（丹尼） ： ]

Wait, that doesn't make sense, how on earth would you know...? 等等，这是没有意义的，如何在地球上，你会知道吗？

   

[Cloud:] [云： ]

Shut your stupid French mouth 闭上你的笨嘴法国

No-one asked you, Glass Joe! GOD! 没有人问你，玻璃乔！上帝！

   

[Danny:] [丹尼： ]

I'm so sorry 我很抱歉

I'm gonna cut your story short 我要砍你的故事很短

Your plot is way too friggin' crazy, and we've got 你的情节是太受诅咒的“疯了，我们有

One more guest we need to meet 还有一个客人，我们需要满足

And here he is now! 在这里，他就是现在！

   

[Frogger (Danny):] [青蛙过河（丹尼） ： ]

Hi, my name is Frogger, and I try to cross the street! 嗨，我的名字是青蛙，我努力过马路！

   

[Cloud:] [云： ]

Fuck you, Frogger! 你他妈的，青蛙过河！

I killed Hojo and I went to the planet's core 我杀了北条，我去了地球的核心

Sit down, Ninja Gaiden! I'm not done, you stupid whore! 坐下来，忍者龙剑传！我还没说完，你这个愚蠢的婊子！

We defeated Sephiroth, who was now in god-like form 我们打败Sephiroth的，现在谁是神状

And we cast a Holy spell to stop the asteroid storm 我们投下了神圣的咒语阻止小行星风暴

The Lifestream stopped the Meteor, the whole planet was saved 该Lifestream停止了流星，整个地球被拯救

   

[Dig Dug (Danny):] [挖挖（丹尼） ： ]

After hearing that plot, I think I have to go shave 听说剧情后，我觉得我必须去刮胡子

   

[Cloud:] [云： ]

You got somethin' to say, Dig Dug?! You wanna fucking go -- 你有事端说，掏挖？你想他妈的去 -

wait why's this hose in my ass OH JESUS GOD NO!!! -- 等待为什么是这个软管在我的屁股俄亥俄州耶稣为神号！ -

   

[explosion] [爆炸]