Like any morning of my junior year I stumble in the classroom late but this day I see 像我大三的任何早上我偶然在课堂上迟到，但今天我看到

Faces, I feel an air like a funeral, like a wake, as I sit dow. 脸，我觉得空气像一个葬礼，像之后，我坐在道。

My teacher speaking, somewhat somberly, but still confident and calm. 我的老师说，有点阴沉，但仍然自信和从容。

Part eulogy, her speech, and part poem, part celebration song. 部分悼词，她的讲话，以及部分首诗，部分庆典歌曲。

Her warmth and smile, she passes photocopies out to us of entries from a journal 她的热情和笑容，她通过作品的影印出我们从一个杂志

Kept so long ago. She starts to read and suddenly it’s 1980. 很久以前保留。她开始读，突然它的1980

   

March 5-The cancer is furious but our son is resilient, 3月5日，癌症是愤怒的，但我们的儿子是有弹性的，

we have all the faith we’ll get through this no matter what the end. 我们拥有所有我们将通过这个得到不管到底的信念。

Treatments are violent but he keeps on smiling. 治疗方法是暴力，但他一直在微笑。

It’s amazing finding joy in the little things. 这是在小事上惊人的发现的喜悦。

   

April 12-Andrew’s appetites improved and we thank God everyday. 4月12日，安德鲁的胃口改善，我们感谢上帝每一天。

But still it’s hard sometimes to see him in that scarecrow frame. 但仍然很难，有时看到他在那稻草人框架。

   

July 9-There’s a suffering when I look in his eyes. He’s been through so much. 7月9日，有一个痛苦，当我看着他的眼睛。他已经经历了这么多。

We’ve all been through so much but what incredible resolve our little boy shows, 我们都经历过这么多，但令人难以置信的是什么解决我们的小男孩演出，

only 7, standing face to face with death. 只有7个，四目相对死亡。

He said it’s easy to find people who have suffered worse than him. 他说，人们很容易找到谁也比他遭遇更差的人。

“Like Jesus, suffered worse than anyone,” he told me last night, “when God abandoned him.” “像耶稣，比任何人都遭遇更糟，”他告诉我，昨晚， “当上帝抛弃了他。 ”

   

September 20-We’ve been playing in the yard lately and spirits are high 9月20日 - Weve一直在院子里玩，最近和兴致都很高

although his blood counts aren’t. 虽然他的血球计数都没有。

   

October 14-He feels tired all the time. 10月14日，他觉得累了所有的时间。

   

November 30-At the hospital again. It feels like home when we’re here. 11月30日在医院了。这感觉就像回家时，我们在这里。

   

December 8-He’s getting worse. 12月8日，他越来越差。

   

January 19-We buried our son today, our youngest child, 1月19日 - 今天，我们埋葬我们的儿子，我们最小的孩子，

and while his death was ugly we must not let it scare us from God. 虽然他的死亡是丑陋的，我们不能让它吓唬我们与神。

Abundant grace has restored him. A brand new body. 丰盛的恩典已经恢复了他。一个全新的身体。

And set him free from the torture, finally rid of the cancer. 并把他的折磨，终于摆脱了癌症的自由。

Before the moment he left he briefly wrested from death, suddenly opened his eyes, said, 此刻临行前，他简要地从死神手中夺回，突然睁开了眼睛，说，

“I SEE EVERYTHING. I SEE EVERYTHING.” “我看到的一切。我看见一切。 “

   

And I will never forget it, the peace and the comfort you displayed through a pain 我永远不会忘记它，和平与安慰你通过显示疼

that I can only imagine. The loss of a child to the torture of cancer. Help me. 我只能想象。一个孩子的丢失癌症的折磨。帮我。

Because I can only imagine how you recovered, 因为我只能想象你如何恢复，

kept your faith and held the brightness of life inside the smile of a child you had to bury. 保持你的信心和保持生命的亮度的孩子，你有埋葬的笑容里。

And I will never forget him or your steadfast faith. 我永远不会忘记他或你的坚定信念。

No, I will never forget you. Now six or seven years later, I’m devoid of all faith. 不，我永远不会忘记你的。现在六七年过去了，我都缺乏信心。

I am empty of comfort and I am weary of waiting. 我空虚的安慰，我厌倦了等待。

Though I’ve felt nowhere what you have, I see nothing at all. 虽然我觉得无处你有什么，我看什么都没有。

Though I’ve felt nowhere what he did, my eyes are closed. 虽然我觉得无处他做了什么，我的眼睛是闭着的。